What if everything we thought we knew about somebody was a lie?

Humour me while I get to the point here and explore this concept with you.

And what if that somebody was you?

Regular drinking and drugging and self-harm of any description towards oneself is war, it’s war against one’s self, isn’t it?

It’s a series of micro aggression’s that eventually end up as one big act of war against your own body, mind, emotions and spirit, isn’t it?

“If wars can be started by lies, peace can be started by truth.”
-Julian Assange

Are we in effect waging war against ourselves with bad relationship choices, illicit substances, even legal substances that negatively impact our wellbeing?

I’d say, yes because despite what we tell ourselves no one forced us to sleep with that emotionally unavailable lover, snort that line or down that 3rd bottle of champagne, did they?

Nope.

So, what part of yourself don’t you like that much that you’ve gone to war with it? Your emotional self worth, your physical health or your mind that has a proclivity to depression if you drink, or all 3?

If you thought you unconditionally accepted yourself warts and all, it’s time to think again, because your actions beg to differ, don’t they?

Yeah, yeah, but it was all just for a laugh but it’s not funny when you’ve got snot pouring into you cup of tea through your tears because you saw your lover out with someone else they obviously do have emotional feelings for.

Because if you unconditionally loved and accepted yourself, you wouldn’t need to supress the shameful or distasteful parts of yourself and your low self worth using alcohol or other drugs, would you?

Your shadow aspects would be allowed their space too and they’d be integrated with the sides of yourself you do like. You would accept yourself as being equal parts good to equal parts bad and you’d be whole, wouldn’t you?

The litmus test would be that you’d be able to sit there, with yourself and feel whatever icky feelings come bubbling up. You wouldn’t need to numb or run from them because you’d have already accepted them; they are the other half of you.

So, are you ok to take a look at yourself through a new lens? From a completely different perspective.

Do you have the courage to see through your current behaviours viewing them with a fresh lens? Would you be willing to go on a new journey of understanding?

Alcoholism is a story of deception, lies, and denial that ends in spiritual bankruptcy. By going to war against your feelings versus giving them ear time you think you’ve taken the easier softer route don’t you? There’s no shortcut though, war just creates more war, more discord, more chaos, you know that if you’ve ever watched two brothers that just can’t let up with their battling.

If you choose peace, and continue to choose peace then this is not the end of your story it’s just the beginning of it. As painful as it might be to acknowledge, you need to feel to heal don’t you and only in accepting both sides of you, can you ever really be whole. Bring the truth to light. But choose peace.

Only you get to decide the relationship you have with yourself and if you need help to do that then reach out. You can take review whether a  30 min Life Coaching session with me is a fit for you, here.